I grew up in an affluent town close to Washington, D.C. Everybody’s parents had money, were powerful, or were both. I shit you not, a lot of my classmates had godparents that were senators and CEOs and they would brag about it constantly. My family was not rich or powerful, but my parents insisted on living in that town because of the excellent school district that it was in. As a result, I was the poor kid and couldn’t compete with my classmates. I didn’t want to feel left out when they were all bragging, so in the second grade I told them that my dad was best friends with Andrew Lloyd Webber and that one of the characters in CATS was based on me. They got really excited about it and asked me which one, and since I had never seen the play and couldn’t name any of the characters, I told them that if they couldn’t figure it out, they clearly weren’t true fans and walked away. Why I picked Andrew Lloyd Webber to be my dad’s fake best friend is beyond me.

Pic unrelated.